Ulloo 3 - Egypt
BANZAI!!!!!
(Raj)
BANZAI!!!!
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, swish, swish, whoosh!
Haa, haa, haa!
Today Urroos in Egypt. This very ancient country furrl of ord buirdings corred pyramids. They over 5000 years ord or something!! This country rurled by man corred Pharaoh arso very ord! He ormost ready to be a mummy!
Here are three ferrows.
This man corred Raj. He word famous papermaker with BSc, PhD, MRSC, CChem, CCh, ECh and stuff after his name. He think of papermaking 24 hours of the day. He even think of papermaking in his sreep in'e!
This ord ferrow corred donkey! He rive in Egypt and carry tourists to pyramid!
This young ferrow corred Egypt Man who orso rive in Egypt! He owner of donkey!
Game is simpre! Raj must negotiate price of donkey ride with Egypt Man.
This game we coor:
THE PAPERMAKER-DONKEY RIDE COST CONUNDERUM!!!!!!!!!!
Barginning must be in Engarish pounds. Engarish pound very ord and expensive! Egypt pound orso very ord but not so expensive!
But hord on! Papermaker can't speak rokarl ranguage!
So which ranguage they speak here crever ferrow?
I don't know, don't ask me, I not study ranguages at schoor! Maybe they speak Hierogryphic or something!
So wirll Papermaker settrle it with Egypt Man?:
HOY!
Between 40 to 60 pounds?
HOY!
Between 20 to 40 pounds?
HOY!
Or between 10 to 20 pounds?
PRACE BETS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on! Come on! We havn't got over 5000 years! They buirld another 100 pyramids by then!!
BETTING ENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOY!
Barginning commences!
Egypt Man asking for 60 pounds! Oh that hurt! No Egypt Man! That too much for one poor ord donkey!
Papermaker offer 10 pounds!
No! No! Egypt Man not having such rlow offer! He rook angry!!
Papermaker offer 15 pounds!
Egypt Man rook rike he want to spit!!
Papermaker now raises stakes to 20 pounds!!
Egypt Man rooking happy now! He accept!!!!!!!!!!!
So if you bet:
HOY!
Between 40 to 60 pounds - YOU ROOS!
HOY!
If you said between 20 to 40 pounds - YOU ORLSO ROOS!!!!!!!!
Real cost of one donkey onrly 5 Egyptian pounds!!!!!!!!!! He totarry ripped off in'e?????
Papermaker he rubbish!!!! He pay in totar 80 Engarish pounds for 4 donkeys!!!!!!!!!!
Donkey make ass out of Papermaker - in'e!!!!!!!!!
You Urroos! You better ditch Papermaker before you totarry out of pocket!!!
BANZAI!!!!
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, swish, swish, whoosh!
Haa, haa, haa!
Today Urroos in Egypt. This very ancient country furrl of ord buirdings corred pyramids. They over 5000 years ord or something!! This country rurled by man corred Pharaoh arso very ord! He ormost ready to be a mummy!
Here are three ferrows.
This man corred Raj. He word famous papermaker with BSc, PhD, MRSC, CChem, CCh, ECh and stuff after his name. He think of papermaking 24 hours of the day. He even think of papermaking in his sreep in'e!
This ord ferrow corred donkey! He rive in Egypt and carry tourists to pyramid!
This young ferrow corred Egypt Man who orso rive in Egypt! He owner of donkey!
Game is simpre! Raj must negotiate price of donkey ride with Egypt Man.
This game we coor:
THE PAPERMAKER-DONKEY RIDE COST CONUNDERUM!!!!!!!!!!
Barginning must be in Engarish pounds. Engarish pound very ord and expensive! Egypt pound orso very ord but not so expensive!
But hord on! Papermaker can't speak rokarl ranguage!
So which ranguage they speak here crever ferrow?
I don't know, don't ask me, I not study ranguages at schoor! Maybe they speak Hierogryphic or something!
So wirll Papermaker settrle it with Egypt Man?:
HOY!
Between 40 to 60 pounds?
HOY!
Between 20 to 40 pounds?
HOY!
Or between 10 to 20 pounds?
PRACE BETS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on! Come on! We havn't got over 5000 years! They buirld another 100 pyramids by then!!
BETTING ENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOY!
Barginning commences!
Egypt Man asking for 60 pounds! Oh that hurt! No Egypt Man! That too much for one poor ord donkey!
Papermaker offer 10 pounds!
No! No! Egypt Man not having such rlow offer! He rook angry!!
Papermaker offer 15 pounds!
Egypt Man rook rike he want to spit!!
Papermaker now raises stakes to 20 pounds!!
Egypt Man rooking happy now! He accept!!!!!!!!!!!
So if you bet:
HOY!
Between 40 to 60 pounds - YOU ROOS!
HOY!
If you said between 20 to 40 pounds - YOU ORLSO ROOS!!!!!!!!
Real cost of one donkey onrly 5 Egyptian pounds!!!!!!!!!! He totarry ripped off in'e?????
Papermaker he rubbish!!!! He pay in totar 80 Engarish pounds for 4 donkeys!!!!!!!!!!
Donkey make ass out of Papermaker - in'e!!!!!!!!!
You Urroos! You better ditch Papermaker before you totarry out of pocket!!!
The ripoff donkey ride
(Raj) This was a ripoff donkey/camel ride. Thanks Raj for agreeing on 20 GB pounds per ride!! You Ullooooo! But hold on WE WILL BE BACK! Next time to rip off the ripoff merchants!
Where this Punjab???
(Raj) PYRAMID! PYRAMID! So having been ripped off and not just once Sudesh devises a devlish plan. We will only speak Punjabi (sorry Samji you were out voted on Gujarati). So we stuck to doing just that even with taxi drivers. Not a word of English. The merchants were totally frustrated. One even got so flustered that he tried knocking Raj's hat off his head. But we kept our cool. "Where are you from my friends?" as is always the opening question. "Punjab" we replied in Punjabi. "Where this Punjab?" they asked. Raj drew a map in the air with his finger going vertically from "Kirghistan, Tajikistan, Afghanistan, Punjab!!" Ending in a jab at "Punjab!" But this got the merchants even more confused. Once they know where you are from they can easily switch from English to French, from Italian to Spanish, from German to Japanese and a little Hindi but they have no clue about Punjabi.... at least not for now.
The triumph of the Ulloos
(Raj) After our trip to Luxor we did indeed return to the Pyramids with agreeing on Punjabi only. This time settling for five Egyptian pounds per ride having stuck on "Punj!" the Punjabi word for "five" . Raj almost blew our "Punjabi only" cover by asking Saif in clear English "Saif, can you hand me that camera, I want to take a picture?" right next to the donkey merchant but thankfully it did not register! Few!
A night of entertainment
(Raj) Happy after an evening dining and being entertained by dancers on a boat on the Nile. Come on Sudesh it wasn't that bad was it?
Trip to Luxor by train
Ulloos at the Temple of Karnak.
Valley of the Kings
(Raj) Our guide was the famous Doctor Haddi (NUMBER ONE!) as many called him. Then you were allowed to take pictures in the tombs but without using a flash. So we managed a few decent snaps including this one.
And this one.
(Raj) The art and colours are fantastic but will not last if exposed to light and UV! Unlike us not all visitors stuck to the rule of "no flash" when taking pictures so it's a good thing photography is now banned.
Ulloos with Doctor Haddi - Number One!
(Raj) We booked Doctor Haddi (NUMBER ONE!) through Cooks in Luxor. A friendly gentleman who called us "Ulloos". Some years later while paying a return visit to Egypt with the family Raj met him again by pure chance at the Temple of Hatshepsut and he remembered us!!
Sufi dancers in Cairo
(Raj) This was a memorable night out. Sufi dancers (OK not really but enterainers) performed in a disused old mosque in the centre of Cairo. The music was fantastic. These guys twirled and spun for at least one hour. A magical performance.
The Dancer
(Raj) The colourfully dressed dancer twirled for at least 20 minutes. I would have fallen over after a minute of doing that! When he finished the audience could have also clapped for another 20 minutes but it was more like two but still he deserved it.
Another image of the show
And it was free!!
Luxor
(Raj) Ulloos take a late afternoon felucca ride on the Nile. Quite wonderful.
Last night in Egypt
(Raj) Ulloos make friends with hotel resturant staff on their last night in Egypt. We had a fantastic time and will keep alive our memories of a wonderful country that has so much to offer to the world.
Oh dear! What happened there?
(Raj) Cairo was a bit of a blur at times....... I wonder why???
Where next, you Uloos?
(Raj) Come on you Ulloos time for a bee...!!! Was it that exhausting?